5/5: The Real Deal

Disclaimer: I'm not associated with Trademark Properties, Richard Davis, A&E, TLC, or anything else connected with anything else. I'm just a girl watching a show. And that's that.

Summary: One of those get to know the whole team episodes. An odd one though, as it appears some things couldn’t be discussed. Still, we saw almost everyone this time. Dawn, Lori and Vance finally appear in the series.

It could be the biggest sales day in the history of the state. Lori prepares a breakfast meeting involving the whole company. She brought bananas for the fruit freaks, low-carb snacks and muffins. Dawn announces that they have a 300 unit condo project to complete. The developer sought out Trademark Properties because he liked their values. They are the only people in Charleston who could deal with a project of this magnitude.

Looks like Dawn will take the lead for this project. Richard tells us that she used to be his assistant, but now, she works with multi-family units.

The developers are in Florida, and they need local players. Trademark has to renovate only one unit, which will serve as a model for the project.

When Ginger and Richard walk through, they decide that these former rentals are very bland. Richard wants cosmetic changes, with bold colors to make the unit unforgettable.

As they discuss countertops, the camera goes in for a close-up of Ginger’s painted fingernails. Looks like she’s wearing Chanel’s old Vamp color.

(While contemplating Ginger’s nail polish, I suffer massive finger slippage and break the TIVO. Great. Now Jethro’s mad at me. Reaching behind the TV to fix the calamity, he tips over our coat rack. Chaos ensues. As the TV resets, Richard appears in a commercial for TLC. That’s cool. I wonder if he’ll appear in any other commercials. You know, like how the rest of the TLC stars tell us personal stories. Maybe all the Trademarkers will tell us about how they came of age.)

Ginger and Richard visit the paint store to pick their bold colors. Richard is driving a special Trademark car. It’s blue, with an ad for Trademark painted on the side of it. Richard picks colors. As they leave the store, the man gives Ginger one of those flirty smiles. Hope Ginger goes back for his phone number.

Dawn coordinators pricing and marketing for the project. She sets up a marketing blitz. Agents who will sell the units for this project will take a tour of the model and pick up brochures.

18 days until the opening. Dan’s going to serve as Construction Coordinator. Hopefully, he’ll redeem himself from last week’s episode. He looks a little sturdier, so I’m feeling hopeful. He picks Heart Pine for the floors. Painters begin working on the unit while Dan waits for “Brad” to help him bring the wood back to the unit. Unfortunately, Brad had a flat tire. They rent the equivalent of large milk delivery truck to get the wood back to the unit.

(TIVO is now working again. I’m relieved.)

14 days until the grand opening. They show an agent open house. What’s that? Not sure. I guess they have to sell the project to agents who will, in turn, sell the units. Trademark sponsors Casino Night. They hand out marketing materials and drink. We’re told that the party was a huge success.

12 days until open house. Dan stops off at either Lowe’s or Home Depot to buy light bulbs. He purchases boxes and boxes of light stuff. When he arrives back, he get Kenny to install light fixtures.

11 days left. It’s a summer day in Charleston. Dawn tells us that there is now a sense of urgency for agents to “get in” to the condos.

Uh-oh. Paint is chipping and rippling. Dan confronts the painter and gets him to redo the job. It’ll require the painter to be there all night, perhaps, but it’s going to happen. I can only assume someone has spoken to Dan between last week’s episode and this week. He’s grown a set and finally taken charge. Go Dan!

10 days ‘til the grand opening. The hardwood floors are pre-done, so no fuss is needed. Nice earring and jewelry combination, Ginger!

(Why am I concentrating so much on Ginger’s makeup and wardrobe this week? This is strictly a rhetorical question. Not much tension in this week's show, is there?)

9 days ‘til the grand opening. Dan watches his black galaxy granite countertops getting cut. We watch a monster cutter slice granite. Very cool. The countertops arrive. Wow, they’re very, very pretty. High-end custom granite. Nice.

Things are going well, so Dawn goes on vacation. Using her blackberry, she checks the status of the project. A shot of the sign, “Folly Beach” couldn’t be more appropriate. An attorney calls to tell her that there’s a snag in the project. She freaks out and interrupts Richard, who is eating at a restaurant. They don’t really tell us what’s going on with the contract, so it’s hard to figure out what’s going on. Dawn mentions that the “snag” would make it difficult for buyers when they go to resell their units.

(A commercial for AARP appears. Jethro is outraged. “What are they going to do if I join, give my money to a bunch of Democrats?!)

Dawn has to cut her vacation short. She’s back in her work clothes, leaving Folly Beach. She feels bullied by someone – the developers, maybe? I keep waiting for a better explanation, but alas, there is none. Back at the office, Richard tells her that there’s too much testosterone in the room. Since Dawn has dimples, he sends her to the lawyer’s office to take care of it.

(It sounds sexist, in hindsight, but at the time, it was said in a more charming fashion.)

3 days ‘til the grand opening. Dawn arrives at the lawyer’s office. She just wants to close the deal. Can she do it?

(They aren’t going to tell us what it is, so it must’ve been something serious.)

Meanwhile, back at the unit, Dan is looking for appliance delivery people. Too bad the delivery people have no-showed. The salesman from the store loads up the truck and delivers the boxes himself. He hauls boxes up the stairs himself.

Kenny, the construction guy, straps a box containing a stove onto his back. Dan explains, in a voiceover, that Kenny had a hard time getting the stove up the stairs. (You could say that again.) At the end of the sequence, the sales guy looks like he’s about to collapse, breathless from exhaustion. Funny.

2 days til grand opening. The hardwood pine floors look fabulous. The red bathroom and colorful shower curtain make the place pop. Stainless steel appliances, black granite tops, white cabinets… All gorgeous. But no red door. Richard is clearly annoyed.

1 day left. All contract issues have been resolved. Not only are we not allowed to know what the details of the contract issue, we’re also not allowed to see what brand of OJ Dawn drinks at home. Again, fuzzed out food. What’s going on with all the fuzziness?

Lori brings agents over to the model unit. Each buyer can choose what kind of amenities they want for their unit. The front door is red. Richard makes a joke about not having a permit to paint the outer door. (Does he really need a permit for that?)

Back at Trademark, agents blow balloons for the grand opening. Vance inhales helium and starts talking funny. Food, live entertainment. The condo property is crowded. Buyers have lined up, but Vance is nowhere to be seen. Dawn gets him on the phone and rips him a new one. He’s late. As she’s yelling at him, the camera does one of those Vietnam zoom close-ups.

Vance arrives very apologetic and Dawn accuses him of being habitually late. Vance says he’s only late about some things. Helicopters drop ping pong balls as a promotional stunt. Don’t they need permits for that?

(Flashback: Does anyone remember that WKRP episode where they dropped turkeys from the helicopters?)

As the credits roll, we learn that all three hundred condos were sold by noon. Trademark earned at least $3 million, and set a state sales record of $50 million.

What I learned: I like black granite. Seriously, I have no idea what I learned during this episode. I’m either extremely dense or a bunch of stuff happened that left me clueless. Why did they have to have a party for a bunch of agents? Why did Richard think he needed a permit to paint a door? What was the contract snag?

The other thing I learned: I’m a Vance fan. Bring him in more often, please. He's one of my favorites.

Funniest quote: While putting in light fixtures, Ginger tells us: “It’s very inexpensive to have light fixtures ‘cause that can add so much value to the house.”

Lights are truly a good thing. I rewound it three times before finally figuring out what she meant.

Final thoughts: A so-so episode this week. While we got to see everyone, I felt a little left out of the party. The structure of the show was off. No tension, per se, as I was sure they were going to finish on time. Still, entertaining and fun.

The preview for next week’s show showed someone getting an electrical shock and what looked like a garage collapsing on someone. Should be a hoot.

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Comments

[dg]

That trip to the granite place seemed soooo Mr. Rogers.